I’m probably not the easiest person to live with. But I imagine most of us Type As really aren’t. I like things how I like things, and so help the person who doesn’t understand. So it’s understandable that I told Jesse he ruined Christmas when he peeled the backs off the tags and bows while wrapping my gifts “so I could shake them” (that man knows me so well). It’s also understandable that, after 4 years of dealing with me, he just rolled his eyes and left me on the couch to sulk for five minutes.
What’s not so understandable, however, is how he thought it would ever be acceptable to take the last two crescent rolls for lunch. That’s right. There were two left, and he took both of them. Never mind that there were at least two bowls of soup left (for which the crescent rolls were made), and I would obviously be having a bowl for my lunch. Maybe it was retaliation for telling him he ruined Christmas, but I think the root of this issue lies in the fact that I have married an inconsiderate food whore.
What’s that? You think that’s a little harsh? I suppose you’re right. Or you would be if this was an isolated incident. But it’s not. Sun Chips, graham crackers, rice cakes, cereal, chocolate – anything that I put in the pantry is half, if not all the way, gone by the time I get to it. And what response do I get from the culprit? “Heh heh sucka!” (Still feel sorry for him? Well then I feel sorry for you. Because clearly you have deep moral character flaws and are most likely a Cubs fan in love with Brett Favre.)
Now, I never wanted to be one of those wives, but I really don’t see how I have any other choice at this point – I’m going to have to hide the good stuff. That’s right. The chocolate, the rice cakes, the chocolate, the Sun Chips, the chocolate. . .it’s all going to find a new home in a yet to be determined hidey hole. It’s the only way to keep my strength up to shake those Christmas presents.
